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We talk a lot about trust in relationships. We trust our partners when they tell us their feelings. We trust them about who they are interested in, why they like us. In order to feel our most profound emotions we need to open up, to trust each other. At least that's part of the story.

I'm not sure that part's true. We can feel all of those feelings—love and excitement, passion and interest—without trust. We can even feel another emotion that isn't fun for everyone, but is part of most relationships anyway—fear.

Of course, some of us thrive on fear. We thrive on either evoking it or experiencing it. We thrive on the thrill of potential rather than trust in the known.

Trust, however, is the safety net. Trust is the emotional condom to stop the infection of real (or nonconsensual) danger. We find people who are worthy of trust so we can relax and experience the emotions we want to.

[short] Not in Control

Copyright © 2012 Olivia Dromen

The rough hemp fibers bite into my ankles as she pulls my legs apart. She fiddles with the rope for a moment tying it to the bed frame. The restraint combined with the roughness of the rope is delicious.

“Just relax, toy.”

[short] Just Stand Here

Copyright © 2012 Olivia Dromen

I pull her in for a kiss with both of my hands on her cheeks—a sweet gesture, a possessive gesture. The kiss is hungry—we both want more. Her knees buckle and I tighten the grip of my fingers on her face—I can tell she’s hoping to kneel so she can lick my cunt.

I whisper, “Just stand here and look in my eyes.”

Becoming Dominant (part 3): submission

When your partner drops into submission, it is unmistakable. All of the worries from when they gave you freedom to do something to their body are magnified because now they want to please you, to make you happy by doing whatever you want.

Becoming Dominant (part 2): the first gift

The first gift I was given as a top was the gift to freely do what I wanted to. After discussing what that meant, of course. She said I could tie her up and hit her lightly. It was amazing to realize that kind of power exchange, that freedom.